"Feelin It"

I've been trying to write this for days. Looking for the words to paint the picture of my weekend that still has me smiling and gigling to myself. The truth is I can't describe what happened. All I know is how it felt.

How it felt to be Armenian standing next to other young Armenians with our red, blue and orange flags and our signs saying that we will not settle for bullshit protocols that allow Turkey to continue their lies. How, no matter how hard they try they can not rewrite their bloody history.

No, there are no do-overs for 1.5 million Armenians massacred and there wont be any for you.

How it felt to be a part of something that so many had traveled so far to be present for. Chicago, Philly, Boston, Providence, Florida, Racine, Jersey, and NY, we were all there. How it felt knowing that my Grandfather had literally spent his whole life doing exactly what I was doing, and how I feel like I will never be able to do enough, starting this late in the game. Pride, hope, and a bit of shame, since my face at these things over the years has been a rarity. And I left promising myself that I would do more, though I feel like I have already failed.

And then, there was.....that face...the familiar one. The smart one, the Queens one, the one I saw first, many years ago when it was only 17...

And now it's 25, fresh out of law school, and it felt like no time had passed since I saw him last in 06'. It felt like we were an old school hip hop song being played for the first time in a decade. Like two neighborhood kids being reunited under the trees. It felt like a great fight, like the ones in 02'. It felt like crispy September flattery, with young hands and smart words. Too smart for his own good, and too cute for mine...felt like I could get into a whole lot of trouble....

That's what Saturday felt like.

Sunday felt like the whole world was Abbey Lawn. Felt like the whole world was Washington Heights. Felt like the whole world was a Patchwork of Young Leaders Society. It felt like we were the chosen ones, because on that day, we all chose each other. For 108 sun salutations, we were the ones. It felt like for the first time I had something to show for my great idea. I had bodies ready, willing, and able, to do something they had never done before in the name of peace, simply because they were asked to. The Global Mala for Peace happened all over the world on Sunday, but we, made it happen here, in our world, in our home, in our hood, on our turf, with our hearts.
I was the proudest I have ever been on Sunday. Of myself for organizing something from creation to completion, and for everyone that came, contributed, and trusted me enough.

I have been giddy since I left those kids in the park. Left their smiling faces, their warm sincere thank yous, and the love light in their eyes that can only come from learning something new, and doing something that they understood to be bigger than themselves. New relationships were formed on Sunday. Relationships that will change peoples lives, and make a difference in our community. One day, for all time.

It felt like I came out of myself. Like the me I know is in there is the girl who had this weekend.

My weekend wasn't great because I wore a great outfit. Or because I went out every night to a different place, and not because I partied until 4am.

But because I stood up for something,
many things, I believe in.
Because, I felt like it.