Child Wise

If I am still, where I stand, the moment can move me. I dont have to bend time to be with myself, or rewrite history to find some peace. In stillness there is redemption. I don't need to be forgiven for all the past I cant undo. In the warmth of my tears, I find freedom. I find salvation for a child's soul in an adult body. I muffle the cries of a daughter asking to be relieved of something she cant change, because it was never hers to begin with. There is a reason in Yoga, why Child's pose is also known as Wisdom pose. And I am learning it slowly, fumbling like the adult I am. As I bend forward and arch back, I tell a story that doesn't belong to me. The tears pour out and down my face for a lifetime I haven't lived, and a love I haven't fully known and never will. I don't own this. I only come from it, and I must find a way to make it mine.
So I bind and twist, and wring it all out, because if its all on the mat when I'm finished then Ive done my job. I practice Asana like I write. I dont hold on to anything, I leave it all there on the mat and the page. People say I'm brave for being able to bear my soul with the pen. Say that its a gift to have this way with words. And with the gift, comes the fear of letting go so much of myself, that there wont be any me left, for me.